Letting Go

My posts have turned a little deep lately. I promise the next post will be a lot lighter. :)Fortunately trials come and go in our lives. Some last longer than others and we usually learn a great deal from them. However, it's never ideal to be stuck in one and feel there is no way out. That's been me for the past year. It's been hard. I've felt so many emotions: sadness, anger, frustration, resentment, jealously, sadness, deserted, alone, lost, confused, oh and did I mention sadness? I've cried a lot and I do mean a lot. It's been a little overwhelming to say the least. It's something that I've spent many hours praying and fasting about and yet I have still felt the above feelings most of the time. I can't say that I've felt them all the time. I have felt peace and I do know that I'm not alone. Fortunately I have the knowledge of a loving Heavenly Father who sees the grand plan for each of us and knows that is best for me. I also have the knowledge of a loving Savior who has carried more than I will ever have to carry and he is helping me through this. However, some times that knowledge is forgotten and the above feelings creep right in. That's part of being human, I guess.
The trial I'm experiencing isn't something I have a ton of control over. Sure, I do have a part in it, but mostly it's out of my hands. That's the frustrating part.
I've prayed to know the plan for me in this trial to only receive what seems like no direction. As I review the past year, I see no reason for this trial. I see no reason why. I may never know the reason why. However, I do feel the love of my Heavenly Father and my Savior, Jesus Christ. Some times it's hard to believe it's been a year, and to me that is my blessing through it all.
I've come to the realization the last few weeks that I need to let it go. It's been overwhelming my life and my emotions that it's time to stop letting it. I've now changed my prayers. Honestly, I've changed them several times. I'm now ask for help in letting it go. It's time to let it go and move forward. I know I won't be perfect at letting go, but I'm going to let it go little by little. I'm going to be grateful for what I have instead of what I don't have. I'm sure I'll still feel some hard feelings here and there, but that is ok.
I share this in hopes that will help me let it go more completely. I also share this so others know they are not the only ones who have hard times. In a world where so many people show only the wonderful things they are experiencing, it's nice to "suffer with those that suffer" occasionally so you know others are normal too.
Also, please respect my privacy and don't ask me to share more details. Remember I'm letting it go! :)

I'm grateful to listen to Women's Conference this past weekend. I'm grateful for words from prophets and apostles that lift me up and remind me of the important things in life. I'm excited to hear more this weekend!
"Sisters, wherever you are, whatever the circumstances may be, you are not forgotten. No matter how dark your days may seem, no matter how insignificant you may feel, no matter how overshadowed you think you may be, your Heavenly Father has not forgotten you. In fact, He loves you, with an infinite love."
—President Dieter F. Uchtdorf