For the past month or so I've felt a large amount of Guilt! Guilt because my child has watched far too much TV, Guilt because my house isn't very clean, Guilt because meals haven't been well planned or prepared, Guilt because I haven't been a very good wife, friend, daughter or sister, the list could go on and on! I feel like if I had anyone to blame, I would blame winter and all the illnesses it has given our family this year. However, the truth is I would probably still feel guilty (just maybe not as much). As women, we have incredible pressure to do so many things and fulfill so many roles. When you sit down and really think about it, it becomes overwhelming. Luckily we are so busy that there isn't much time to think about it!
I've had more time to sit and think lately (thus the guilt listed above) and I wondered what life would be like without guilt. I came to the conclusion that I wouldn't have it any other way! Guilt drives me to be a better person and to do things that I need to do! If I feel guilty for not reading my scriptures, than I probably need to read them. If I feel guilty about losing touch with a friend, then I probably need to reach out to that friend. Again, the list could go on!
The hardest part is balancing everything. When I was telling a friend I haven't been a very good mom lately because I've been taking it easy trying to feel better, she told me that I was being a good mom because I was taking care of myself. Sometimes I forget to take care of my needs so it was nice to hear! Plus, it took a small portion of that guilt I felt away. It's always good to hear you are doing something right!
So in conclusion, I probably won't be nominated as 'woman of the year' anytime soon, but my kids, husband, family, and friends still love me and hopefully tomorrow I can do better!
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Guilt
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4 comments:
I'm glad you wrote about this. It's refreshing to know that other people feel "guilt". It just goes to show how universal our experiences are, which I find comforting. I have a tendency to look at people and think they've got it all together, then I realize that more often than not, they are thinking and experiencing the same things I am. It makes me not feel alone in this crazy world... I was also thinking that maybe it isn't so much "guilt", but gentle reminders from the Spirit of what we need to do. For what it's worth, and I know you aren't fishing for compliments, but you're going to get them anyway, others do not see you as you see yourself. To me, and I'm sure to many others, you are a shining example of friendship, motherhood, and wifeliness (is that a word?)!
Nice thoughts. You sound guilty of all the things I'm guilty of, but I've probably been guilty a lot longer than you have. It does drive us to be better people, so bring it on! j/k
I'm glad you wrote about this. I've been thinking about this for a while, but didn't know how to put it into words.
I am completely motivated by guilt, ie- visiting teaching. I love doing it because I get to talk and make wonderful friends, but if we didn't do it, I would feel guilty. So out of my own selfishness and not wanting the guilty feelings I do it. This same thought process goes for many things I do or need to do.
Angie, you are a prime example of a wonderful mom, wife, and friend. I know you would do anything for anyone, including your family, so it's ok that you took some time to get yourself better. Don't worry about Brooklyn in front of the T.V. She won't remember watching a lot of t.v. and she'll be just fine.
I suffer with guilt to an extreme. I stay up at night worrying if I'm doing everything I can for everyone that needs me. I think you are right on the nose with everything you said. Good post! I'm glad you shared this!
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