Operation

What a day! The kidney stone was still causing intense pain here and there on Sunday night; it got to the point where I was throwing up my medicine! Marty called the urologist we were referred to at 8 am Monday morning, but they didn't open until 9. Then they proceeded to give him the run-around. They told him the doctor was really busy and wouldn't be able to see me, etc. The ER doctor told us this would happen, but to be persistent. Oh, and Marty was! He doesn't like to be forceful or pushy, but he did it for my benefit. He was told the doctor would call us back around 10. Of course he didn't so Marty called again and the nurse says 'the doctor isn't in the office today and I told you that already', which of course she didn't. Marty then had to be a little more forceful and finally was able to talk to his nurse. The nurse was a more helpful and after a few phone calls back and forth, I was scheduled to see the doctor at 2 pm at LDS Hospital's Outpatient Clinic as an add-on to their schedule that day. The doctor wanted me to wait until Wednesday, but Marty would not allow that because he needed to get back to work and I wasn't keeping the medicine down plus Eliza needed some normal milk again. So many reasons!
I spent most of Monday laying in bed and Marty did the mom thing. He came in the room once and said 'I'm not cut-out to be a stay at home dad'. Finally, it was time to get up and get this taken care of.
I walked into the Outpatient Clinic completely blind! No one told us what was going to happen. We assumed it was going to be a simple procedure that took at the most 3 hours. Not so! My mom left work early to watch Brooklyn because she wanted to help and we took Eliza with us since she might need to eat. When I registered, I signed some paperwork for anesthesia and that's when it hit me, 'what kind of procedure is this?' They took me back to a room and I put on another lovely hospital gown and had another IV. My poor right arm is tired of needles! The nurse asked if I was staying the night or going home? We had no idea what was going on since no one told us anything so we said we didn't know.
The nurse left for a little while then came in and said it would be about 3 hours until the doctor could see me! What?! So we sat in the little room for a total of 4 hours before it was my turn. I was the last person left in the clinic so the nurse talked to Marty and I and finally explained what was going to happen.
I was having full on surgery! I was not prepared for this and my nerves started kicking in! They explained I wouldn't be able to feed Eliza either, which caused more worry. I had a procedure called Uteroscopic stone removal. Basically they put you under anesthetics and the surgeon passes a small fiber-optic instrument called a ureteroscope through the urethra and bladder and then into the ureter. The stone is then located and removed with the use of a special cage-like tool (that was the description off the Internet).
I went into surgery at 6 pm. I was able to feed Eliza at about 5 pm before it was my turn, but I had no idea how we were going to feed her when I was done. I remember the anesthesiologist putting something in my IV and him telling me that my vision would get really blurry and then my eyes would want to close, which they did. Then I had an oxygen mask placed on me and was told to breathe deeply and that in 20 seconds I would be asleep. And I was!
Next thing I remember was my body shaking. Completely shaking! Shaking so hard that it woke me up! When I opened my eyes I was in the recovery room being covered with warm blankets. The nurse asked how I was feeling and I remember my mouth being extremely dry and feeling the need to use the bathroom. I told him that and he said 'that's normal. We'll get you to your room in a few minutes'. Then he had another patient arrive so he left me for awhile. When he came back I told him again that I needed to use the bathroom and he finally got me a bed pan. Apparently after this type of surgery, the need to use the bathroom is that much greater in order to clear the kidney out.
The doctor came into the recovery room and told me that when they went in to grab the stone with the basket, it pushed it back into the kidney. So he went in with a laser and blasted it to smithereens! I imagined it being like a Star Wars laser gun and my doctor feeling so manly that he got that evil stone! :) When they went back into the kidney with the basket to gather pieces, he said he couldn't find any so they were more like powder and would come out easily now. He put in a stint to help with the healing and I'll have to go visit his office on Thursday to have it removed. I don't even want to know how he's going to get it out!
Everything went well so I was able to come home last night. I went to a room on West 6 for about 30 minutes to get my IV out and change into my clothes. I was happy to leave, but didn't feel much better yet.
The hardest part of all of this was Eliza. I'd been told my 3 different people to wait 3 different amounts of time (ranging from 8 hours to 24 hours) before I could feed Eliza again. She was screaming at Marty before I was out of surgery. A nurse on West 6 was cool and grabbed some formula from the Nursery, but Eliza wouldn't swallow it. We got her into the car and she fell asleep. I had some milk in the freezer at home, but she didn't want that either. Marty and I finally got her to drink 1.5 ounces and then she wouldn't drink anymore. We even resorted to feeding her some rice cereal, which we hadn't had a chance to start with her yet, and she didn't want that. So we just put her to bed hungry. It was so sad, but we prayed a lot and she slept. She had a long day at the hospital and an even longer weekend with mom's milk being weird anyway.
When she woke up at 5 am this morning, I just fed her and prayed I wouldn't harm her. I had 'pumped and dumped' some of my milk earlier that night so felt it would be OK. She's been drowsy and irritable all weekend so I don't think her body likes the drugs, but what else can I do?
Today I'm at home trying to take it easy while Marty went back to work and Grandma Pat has Brooklyn. Eliza is still making it hard to rest, but she needs me close by so we'll make do.
I have lots of Why Questions. Why did this happen to me? Why now when I have a 4 month old that needs me so much? Why did it happen with this baby that won't take a bottle? Why? Why? Why? The truth is I'll never know. But at least for now the pain is gone and life will go on.
It's been a rough month around here. Hopefully April will be better!